Many things I lost over years

The feeling of sadness, for the child. The feeling of guilty, for myself.

What is my current life? My heart is not pleased. But I could not find a way out. It is the endless fogs around.

What I have lost over years? Long time ago, I did not have evil feeling against anybody. I thought communications could always solve problems. I had many dreams.

I had been fighting, maybe since I lost trust in others, since I found ugliness and evilness in the world. Yes, I succeeded in not being exploited, but I lost many things I once had. I lost myself.

In the eve of 2009 Chinese New Year, I said to myself: for everyone I encountered and was not pleased with, I let my grudge go. Everyone is offered a new beginning in my world, no matter what we have went through.

I see things that I could do in the near future, meaningful things, that would please my heart.